Events
Tighten the Chinstrap on Your Party Hat
This article crushes too much for a description.
LaBEARday In The Rockies
Driving through the (mostly) unburnt forest of central Colorado, discussing whether or not Yak milk would make a good Latte, the truck was alight with laughter and music. This was to be a grand weekend, the best LaBEARday yet. The truck-bed was full of coolers stocked with ice, various marinated meats, cheeses, and cool beverages, which to be sure would add to the vehicle’s ability to grip the winding country roads making our way up, up the mountain.
Our Sleuth had rented a grand lodge on a hillside overlooking a sparsely populated ski town on the edge of Lake Granby. In the distance towards the west, it looked as if the top of a volcano had blown off the top of a mountain. Smoke billowed from the top as we pulled up to the cabin. However, not a doubt or fear entered our mind as we knew the smoke would not dampen our weekend of canoeing, hiking, and meals around a large table.
“Trust the Pan”
The idea for this weekend is credited, by all accounts, to the lady bears in our group. Spicy Sar Bear, Sarah Bear, Potters Garden Bear, and Zezzie Bear coordinated the lodging, and planned the meals. The men pitched in picking up the food, drinks, and accompanying necessities at various grocery stores. Some of the bears brought amazing vegetables from their gardens, and BearNaked Ben even made items crafted from braided 550 Paracord. The teamwork in putting this together was almost as epic as when Louis met Clark. We were a few short as not everyone in our crew was able to make it to this outing but I just want you to know that in your honor, I and everyone else ate an extra serving of Sarah Bear’s amazing “Trust the Pan” lasagna.
Upon arriving at the BearBNB, my daughter went to work cooking up a triple batch of sourdough pretzel bites which she had prepared earlier that morning. As she set the table, the Top Gun soundtrack blared from the overhead speakers. Claws were cracked open, and many hugs went around as everyone began to arrive. Cheers were cheered, and at over 8,200 ft above sea level I dare say our high fives were much higher than any other ‘fives’ on the continent that day.
Later on while seated around the fire, RiffinBear broke out the guitar and proceeded to throw pleasing sound grenades at our ear holes with some well known guitar riffs. The guitar is fast becoming a mainstay at many an Unbearables gathering. I too partook in the melodious festivity and tried my hand at the Indian Wood Flute while Blonde Genius Bear soothed us with the melodic Hand Pan.
‘Twas to be a full moon that evening, and not an owl was in sight. Not even a middle aged bulldog whose bark, worse than his bite”
More than half of all bear meetups have taken place on a full moon (I’m not verifying that claim) or “La Luna” as our Osos Españos prefer to say. It is rumored that this is due to the higher intelligence and resourcefulness common in our community. As you’re well aware, a full moon ads 50 lumens of ambient outdoor lighting which reduces the number of tiki torches needed to have an optimum book burning experience or an evening round of backyard golf. But I digress.
“Gravy was ladled, logos flowed like wine, and strong bonds were forged.”
By the end of the first evening together, one of our group had free climbed a ski lift (no doubt in search of honey or a bramble of blackberries), and my daughter and I had demonstrated on the gas stove how a boiling soda can of water can crush itself when thrown into an ice bath. Gravy was ladled, logos flowed like wine, and strong bonds were forged. So it goes on a typical weekend for the bears, literally sleuthing and crushing.
Besides canoeing and hiking to a waterfall, we hadn’t felt the need to schedule too many events. I of course had with me throwing knives, rope for knot tying classes, and a belt sander we could fix together if we got bored. None of these items got much attention however, because time flew as we just sat around the fireplace talking and laughing until the wee hours of the night.
The next day after a hearty breakfast and being spoiled with a goat milk latte prepared by Blonde Genius Bear, we were fully refreshed and looking forward to a hike in the cool mountain air. Tartan Bear had taken the time to reserve a couple canoes and kayaks. That was a great idea. And Twelth Hour Bear suggested we hike to a spring fed waterfall nearby. To be out of the city together with likeminded legends was well needed by all. I’d heard more than once that weekend, how many of us couldn’t imagine what they’d do with their time without a blessed group of loving individuals such as ours. I know many of you also feel the same way, and for those that haven’t experienced it yet, there couldn’t be a better time than now.
This is how it starts, the building of a strong nation. If you’re a crusher, if you’d like to build Bearships and design castles, Beartaria welcomes all crushers. Or even if you just want to grow the crops and milk the goats that feed the builders and the rock levitators, it’s time. It’s time to tighten down the chin strap on your party hat and pull on your work boots. So if you haven’t already, sign up at bearvibe.com, thegreatbeartrail.com, bearsaloon.com . From there, you can check out the Bear Maps and begin talking to others in your area.
Onward friends.
If you have any stories, great or small you’d like to share, we’d love to hear them! Email them to events@beartariatimes.com and make sure to let us know if there are going to be any future events you’d like to promote!
Dedicated to the rocky mountain unbearables. Thank you for embracing me and being a blessing to my family with your kindness, love, and cheer.
Events
New Vendors, Workshops and Events At The 2024 Beartaria Times National Festival! (Bean Spilling)
This year, The Beartaria Times National Festival will step it up with new speakers, bands, vendors, workshops, and micro-events!
This year, The Beartaria Times National Festival will step it up with new speakers, bands, vendors, workshops, and micro-events!
Here are some insights of what to look forward to!
Micro-Events:
This year, the growing festival team will utilize the banquet tent to host micro events each night. Plans include having the Singles Mixer on Friday evening, which was missing from previous years.
Festival management also plans to host a business mixer on Saturday Evening as an addition to the festival to promote networking and the economy in our community.
Expected Workshops:
Arm Candy Chainmail will be teaching how to make chainmail.
Farming Artist will have a workshop to discuss and demonstrate the intricacies of beekeeping.
Fermenting Bear will demonstrate the art of fermentation in a hands on lesson.
Fort Brown Bear will demonstrate the full process of how to process a meat bird by old and new processes.
Practical Bear will be discussing how to achieve financial independence at all income levels.
This will include strategies and services to eliminate debt, reach financial goals, and leave a legacy for future generations.
Food Vendors:
This year, we expect some great food and beverage booths. Here is a snapshot of what we are looking forward to!
Beartaria Beef
Handcrafted lemonade, iced tea, hamburgers, hot dogs, sausages
Fruiti Fizzis
Organic Popsicles
Ice Cream by the scoop
Homemade Kombucha
Homestead Goods
Organic Smoothies, Frappes
Distilled Water
Fermented Goods
Donuts, coffee, oatmeal bar
Sourdough baked goods
Lumpia (Filipino eggrolls) and Pancit (noodles with chicken, cabbage, carrots)
Puerto Rican Food
General Vendors:
This year we are looking forward to meeting some amazing vendors and welcoming back some vendors from previous years. Here are some vendor product and services you can expect to see in 2024.
Ceramics, prints
Precious metals
Chainmail jewelry
Musical Book
Books
Handmade, vintage silks/scarves
Herbal remedies for wound care, arthritis, aches and pains, and supplying nutrients through the skin
Body, hair, and kitchen soaps and shampoos
Bath bombs and bath soaks
Kitchen and laundry soaps
Baby care cosmetic items
Regular cosmetics;
Herb-based animal toys (catnip, mice, etc.)
Plant-based insect repellents and insect bite relief
All Natural Clothing
arts/crafts/creations
handmade crocheted (and possibly hand-sewn) items such as head scarfs, bags, hats, or dish towels made with natural/sustainable materials (wool, cotton, linen, etc.)
leather goods
Bear-related metal art.
Honey
Honey products
Bee pollen
Bee Propolis
Beeswax
Beeswax candles
Seeds
Tinctures, teas, tallows, salves, balms, also hair braiding & hair beads/tinsel for children
Garden Products / BioChar
Homeschooling Curriculum / Books
Wood bear cutouts, stickers, magnets, and olive oil.
Safety/Security/1st Aid
This year Beartaria Times will also be adding a concession store to help with odds and ends that festival goers may need to help make a more comfortable experience.
Big things are in the works and the festival is right around the corner!
Ticket Sales end August 4th!
Events
Applications Now Open For Topher’s Dome Building Workshop
The workshop will be for a small crew of 12 people!
Christopher Gardner (Topher) is preparing an exclusive dome building workshop in Missouri and applications are now open!
The workshop will be for a small crew of 12 people!
This workshop would be a three day event of at least 3 hours of serious labor and skill building each day with approximately 2-3 hours a day of study and lectures.
In this workshop you will get your hands dirty as you are guided through the process of building the foundations of a Dome structure and framing it out to completion of the first of 3 stages in the dome construction process.
The labor will consist of learning and executing proper earth bag techniques and concepts while learning from the best!
This workshop is in high demand and to facilitate it Beartaria Ozark Campground has listed an application for anyone interested.
Events
National Festival Speaker Line-Up Announced!
Who to expect Live in Missouri at The Beartaria Times National Festival Conference?
Beartaria Times Event Management has announced this years speaker line-up and it’s looking like a great conference!
Who to expect Live in Missouri at The Beartaria Times National Festival Conference?
Tom Barnett
Tom Barnett is a holistic health practitioner and mindset coach, covering diverse topics from law, culture and sociology to human health and spirituality.
Many people from all walks of life have found value in Tom’s relaxed and calm demeanor while getting right to the point, providing valuable, stable content that will remain applicable for life.
In these times, Tom’s value has been truly appreciated for his consistent ability to ground people in what matters.
Bradley Stone
Bradley Stone was born and raised in Dallas, Texas. At 21 he started his first business – a direct marketing firm representing the Texas Rangers. After having a ton of success with the Rangers, he created the opportunity for himself to move to California at 22 to open another direct sales office representing the LA Angels of Anaheim and the LA Dodgers. By the time Bradley was 29 he had opened 30 offices nationwide with 500 employees working with clients like the MLB, NHL, AT&T, Verizon and many others. In his 7 years in California, Bradley’s organization generated $40M in revenue. His business also led him to meet his wife, who changed the way he looked at business and life.
In 2019 Bradley exited his direct sales company and moved back to Dallas to be close to his family and start one of his own.
He is currently working as a small business consultant at Paychex, Inc. and owns his own consulting company. His company helps all types of businesses whether they are just starting out or preparing to sell their business in an acquisition. He advises and guides small businesses and individuals on increasing their sales, improving their techniques and strategies, and building stronger customer relationships.
Bradley currently lives in a small town outside of Dallas with his wife and 2 young children. He and his wife plan to homeschool their children in order spend as much time as possible with them as they grow. Thankfully, his business allows him to do just that.
The Juice Boss
As a wellness visionary, feel-good junkie and relentless seeker of truth, Nick has successfully forged his greatest passions to create a new category and thriving brand.
Nick takes a biohacker & shaman-like approach to diet, lifestyle and mindset. He obsesses on quality of ingredients & living a vibrant, purposeful life. Paired with his endless pursuit of knowing “what’s next” and “what delivers real results” he provides his clients with unique access to products & programs that allow the body to do what’s it’s designed to do- heal.
Inspired by an array of censored thought leaders, self-improvement gurus and ancient healers, Nick has grown to appreciate the opportunity in every challenge as he follows divine signs & intuition to guide the future of his business, family, and everything in-between.
As a dedicated practitioner of radical honesty and self-experimentation, his ideas, opinions and intentions are rarely misperceived.
Mr. Permie Bear
Adam Stevens aka Mr. Permie Bear does about everything that strikes his fancy, many of those things all at the same time. He is a former stock broker, having specialized in international securities and day trader services.
After his trading days were done, he began a career in banking and eventually became a commercial lender before he retired from finance as a whole. He is a graduate of the Oregon Banker’s Association Executive Development Program. He left finance to pursue a life closer to the land and things that matter, such as raising children. He is a Certified Permaculture Designer, dairyman, vegetable farmer, construction worker, consultant, seed salesman, occasional sawyer, and aspiring jack-of-every-possible-trade-under-the-sun.
He is the Founder of Legends Repair and Remodel and co-founder of Grateful Harvest Seed Company. He and his wife also operate Piney Creek Farm in the Missouri Ozarks. He dreams of creating a place where people can learn about and interact with permaculture and regenerative farming systems of all kinds and then use what they learn to create a more resilient and fulfilling life on whatever scale makes sense to them.
Christopher Gardner
Topher Gardner is a professional sculptor of curved ferro-cement buildings and the human body. His chiral phenomenology has led him into the Permaculture world where the BioDynamic principles of Rudolf Steiner predominate.
Making deep black soil with the carbon amendment of BioChar, which is pyrolised carbon, gives the ground the correct substrate for beneficial micro-organisms. His goal is to appropriately signal the Natural World as to induce a higher quality life.
Owen Benjamin
Owen Benjamin was born to John Kares Smith and Jean Troy-Smith, both professors at State University of New York at Oswego. He attended college at the State University of New York at Plattsburgh where he started performing standup comedy and also got his start in television at the student run station Plattsburgh State Television. Owen also studied history in the Czech Republic with a focus in tyrannical governments.
Owen Benjamin became known in Hollywood for various movie appearances, announcing for major award shows and having multiple main stream comedy specials. He became massively popular for never pulling punches on social media, exposing the industry for being a tool of social conditioning and shameless hypocrisy. Never letting social status or money get in the way of what needed to be said (and what many people quietly agreed with), Owen prioritized truth and comedy above all.
Owen was one of the only established comedians to speak out against agendas to normalize child abuse with hormone altering drugs and sexual exploitation in 2016. Fighting this agenda publicly resulted in his exile from Hollywood.
Owen Benjamin doubled down on truth and refused to compromise or take the path of manipulative money & accolades (also called “lollipops & fancy pants”). As a result, his audience grew rapidly and his live streams began pulling more views than main stream news outlets, rolling out hours of hilarious content daily. Having this level of reach and influence without giving into the manipulations to push agendas or avoid topics made Owen became a major target for deplatforming from various services involved in the attempted social conditioning of the public.
As Owen Benjamin sought to find solutions in an atmosphere that hyper-focused only on problems, he found that taking responsibility, being self sustainable, and self reliant as the right path forward. As a result, he became one of the biggest advocates for people homesteading and growing their own food wherever they are, even if it starts with a seed on a city balcony.
Owen Benjamin began to thoroughly understand the criminal nature and mechanisms used to actively discriminate and slander both him and his audience. By not bending to the social agendas of the perverted and destructive news media, his path forward was to build his own platforms and services where he can be free to speak his mind and connect with others who want to be a part of the good, the true and the beautiful.
Owen Benjamin is the Founder of Beartaria and related projects that has now built a life of its own and spear heads the movement to self reliance and independence through responsibility and self reliance. He lives a beautiful life with his wife Amy and his four children, Walter, Charlie, Jack and Fredrick.
This years speaker line up is looking amazing!
Tickets will only be available for 3 more weeks! Make sure to pick them up before sales close down!
Ticket sales close August 4th.
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